This post is part of a series I’m calling The Mother’s Project, where I will be highlighting the incredible moms in my life throughout the month of May.
Becca is my (only) little sister. And she is about to have a baby! Yes, she is younger than me and yes, she has been married for less time, and yes, she is way more prepared for motherhood than most people I know, including myself.
When Becca got pregnant, no less than 30 people asked me if it made me want to have children. The shortest and most honest answer I can give is, “Absolutely not.” Hold your judgement: I have a really good reason.
My single most favorite thing about my family has been watching my siblings become parents. It is just so amazing to see them create these little humans and then be responsible for raising them. My oldest sister just blossomed into the best version of herself and my brother is the most tender I’ve ever seen him. I’m having way too much fun watching them take on these new roles to do it myself.
If I had my own kids, I feel like I wouldn’t be paying as much attention to these transitions in my siblings’ lives. I couldn’t come home for 5 days and babysit for them or spend hours each week FaceTiming with their kids. This is such a fun season with my family and I wouldn’t trade it for anything.
Becca is going to be no different. The little guy brewing has made her throw up on an almost daily basis and she still can’t talk about him without tearing up. She talked about being a mom the second she got married. And the act of mothering thrives so innately in her. When we were little, my sister Mattie and I always played “Friend” and we pretended we were friends (more on this game in another post because clearly this needs to be fleshed out a little more). Becca always wanted to play “Family” though so she could take care of all the little dolls.
For the past three years, she has been watching our nephew and niece almost every week. Our sister Katie jokingly refers to her as the best “Mother’s Help.” She treats those kids like they are her own. She knows what each variation of Addie’s cry means and knows all of Max’s ever-changing favorite foods, songs, TV shows, and T-shirts.
She is going to slide so easily into motherhood because she has been a patient observer and subtle helper for her entire life. Becca will never be a loud presence in a room. She doesn’t demand attention or dominate conversation. But if you watch her, she is always contributing. She is swiftly picking up dishes or whipping up a dessert in the kitchen. She is wiping snot/spit-up/poop and cleaning as she goes. She is handing you your purse or hanging up your keys or simply arranging your remotes for the 17th time that day.
Her natural instinct is to help and listen. I can’t remember a time she wasn’t willing to listen as I whined about something or when I asked for her help and she wasn’t willing to give it. She will be the kind of mom that has all her bases covered, and it’s always going to look effortless. Her diaper bag will always be organized and packed with extra clothing, wipes, and snacks. And not just snacks for the kids. Becca comes prepared with snacks for adults too. (If you live in PA and need a Mommy friend, I suggest hitting that up now.)
But that isn’t what is going to make her kids love her. Her kids will love her for her unending patience, for the way she makes simple daily activities fun, for being the mom with the best desserts, and the way she makes them laugh. Becca has an incredible sense of humor. And it’s one that gets better with age. I feel like every year she just gets funnier. I think one of the best gifts a mom can give is showing her kids how to have a sense of humor.
If there is one thing I’m dreading, it will be missing her official entrance into motherhood. I’m just so proud of her and the woman that she has become. I hate that I won’t be there to give her a hug and cry with her and tell her how beautiful her little alien baby looks. Becca deserves to have every cheerleader in the world during the first few weeks of being a new parent. But since I can’t be there to root for her …
Becca, if I was there in October, this is what I would do:
1. Bring you cookies and ice cream. And macaroni and cheese.
2. Make sure you’re taking stool softeners because I’ve heard that first post-birth poop is a real doozie.
3. Give you my Netflix/Hulu/Amazon Prime passwords. (I can actually do that from here, so I’ll just email you.)
4. Come over and sleep at your house when Matt decides he needs to leave at 4:00 am for coon hunting or other basic farmer activities.
5. Change poopy diapers.
I love you so, so much and this baby (and the seven others you plan on having) will be the luckiest one around. I can’t wait to meet him!